and i am back in the game. after fucking my eternal soulmate, i think i was redeemed. i have been just fucking my man and the proletariat for maybe two years now, ut after the moment with my eternal soulmate, here i am again, more vigorous than ever.

i was assigned to another city – one of the most sensual cities i believe, in a week this january. i was with a gay friend and we both know we will be visiting some gay friendly spa in the city – with good looking massuers, sons of god with amazingly sculpted bodies.

i was excited, i love massage and love men too.

first spa visit, a man in his early 20’s handled me. nice massage and all. then he became sensual and asked me if its okay. i said its okay. i was too horny not to accept. thank god he has condom.

second spa visit. a guy named crow serviced me. he has big build, nice and soft touches, big hands, like he can cup my back with his two hands only. and then when he started caressing my legs, his fingers came close to my pearl. and he started kissing me on my neck and on my breasts. he fucked me like an animal, his silhouette still lingers in my memory as he pumped me in that small spa cubicle. god that was amazing.

then my gay friend left me alone in the city. i got bored and was online on a local social media mobile application. a guy messaged me and asked what i was doing. he talks too confidently, and when i saw his pics, he looked good. he was a pilot of the country’s air force and was assigned in the city for a few months now.

i told him i got beer in my fridge and maybe he would like to join me. i gave him my number, and he called me right away. he was in my room after thirty minutes. we were both laughing hard at our jokes, like friends, he is a soldier and i told him i was a communist before. our conversation turned a bit political. but we laughed most of it.

i finished 3 bottles of beer. and i was tipsy. it was 11 in the evening already. i told him i just want company and hoped that he doesn’t have any other expectations aside from chat and company. he is very professional and charmingly confident.

i slipped into my black night gown, and he ushered me into the bed, and laid down there with me as well. i can’t remember how we started it, maybe with a kiss, all i can remember is how he fucked me – god this is the kind of fuck i deserve after lie low for a while. i was moaning and screaming, while he rammed me like a horny rapist. i wonder now if all soldiers fuck like that.

i loved that night with him. at 3am, he left the room. i regret not giving him a goodbye kiss for i was too sleepy. hope i’ll see him again.

the morning came, i sent him a message. told him thanks for the beer and the great fuck. he said thanks too. 🙂

just before christmas, i met a former beloved colleague i was always had feelings for and we both know that and admit to each other. he’s 2 decades my senior, but he is so dear to me, i felt he was lover in a past life or something.

he invited me over to his flat so we could meet before he leaves the country by january.

my relationship with him is more of intellectual and emotional rather than sexual or sensual. we have exchanged sexual massages in the past and we both liked it. but i never got to fuck him until now.

we went out after staying in his flat for a few minutes, going to bars in a local district, drinking beer, watching women dance on stage, talking about our lives, our sensualities, our ideals. we even sang songs ot each other.

and when we got enough of beer, we went back to his flat. he asked me to remove my clothes, and just be sensual to each other caressing, kissing, and touching each other. he removed his clothes too and we were there both naked lying on the sofa. he ate me hungrily, and i sucked his beautiful tool too. i always wanted ot fuck the man and i relaized this is the right moment to do it. so i pinned him down in the sofa, and sat on his tool. i was clutching on his brown hair as i moved, and we were both breathing heavily.

it felt good. feeling somebody inside you, someone so special and dear, i sometimes wish i have met him when he was younger, we might have more mindblowing sex then.

we only fucked once that night. and those images will stay in my mind forever.

i left the flat just before the sun had risen. a few days after, i am in love with him again. there is this bitter sweet pain in my heart for i dont know when im going to see him again. but he assured me he will be back in the country.

i love him. i forever will.

i just met the proletariat from out of town during a field visit. he managed to get into the city i was staying and surprised me in the evening. god i missed the man. we saw each other last month of may, and then just last week. and now i feel this depression, now that i am away from him again, i want to feel him again, to hear his jokes, to feel his caresses, when he sucks my breasts it makes me feel out of control..

in two nights together, we fucked seven times, and everytime he enters me, i shake like im gonna go crazy. he ate me like a hungry animal, and pinned me down to enter me, and as he fucks me, he sucks my breasts violently, it still aches a bit till now..

i am not sure what the future holds for both of us. i meet him when i have the chance to get to the field once in a while, he comes to me and then we fuck and cuddle for hours, and talk, and update each other about what’s going on, about his family, about my personal life and all..

i always miss him, in my heart, in my head, how i wish we will have time in the future again..

in the past months, thins came out unexpectedly. the proletariat and i separated our ways right after our first night (previous post), then two weeks after, he called me and said he loves me. it is one of the greatest moment of my life. i didnt say ‘i love u too’. i was confused that time, but just felt happy, and asked him, ‘are u sure about your feeling?’, he said, ‘of course’!

we texted since then, and then later on i felt that i am in love with him too. i can feel his joy whenever we speak on the phone. he is with his family at this time, in a different city, while i stay in a different city too. but we both hope that we will see each other again. he told me that his wife figured out that he had an affair with someone, and that he had to tell her the truth that yes he fucked someone, but not the whole truth, as he did not reveal my identity. the wife felt that he is in love with someone else, i guess the feeling got too strong, and that his treatment with his wife changed. and she was devastated and so hurt.

one day i was reflecting what is it that i really felt for the guy, and i admitted to myself that i love him too. so i told him via phone that no matter what happens, i love him. i knew from the sound of his voice that he was happy, and sorry in a way that he found another love aside from the love that he had for his wife.

we continued our communication, despite some breakdowns of his wife, almost physically hurting him, while i struggle about the thought to be with him, as i stay with the man that i am living with. the feeling so strong, i cry out and ask the heavens why i would fall in love with someone that i know will never be mine. sometimes, i am on the edge of breaking up with him, but our love is so strong, it continues until now.

we had the chance to meet again, and damn, it was one of the most erotic moments of my life. he had a way to send me shivers every time he touches me. i get wet so much for a few minutes of foreplay i beg him to fuck me right away, and when he fucks me, i want it really hard and long, i beg him not to come soon. it has become a very torrid affair. and the fear that we might get caught by colleagues every time we are together adds up to the spice of the relationship.

there was one night we are together and he fucked me and came five times, the morning after my breasts feel swolen and my pussy is aching. god i love the man. and i know that he loves me too. i have changed because of our love. and i dont look at attractive guys the same way i look at them before. my heart felt at peace. and his love filled my heart with so much love i dont even hunger for more. that is why this might be my last blog post, because i might stop my sensual encounters with other men from here, i really do not know what will happen in the future. what i know is that i am full of love already for now.

he is a man with very sexy eyes. the first time i saw him, i was already captured by his mesmerizing eyes. we were together on the field with my other colleagues for an operation for two months. he is the vehicle operator of the pick up that the company rented. he is married and have kids. a very funny man, with the accent of the local people of this part of the region. he is a merry gentleman, but in his eyes, i see some depth i cannot explain.

he treated me like im his little sister for two months. despite my attraction for him, i tried not to let it show. its a bit complicated to be myself if within the confines of work. flirting outside of work is easy. if done with people inside the organization, it becomes a bit risky.

there are times when we stayed at the same staff house, same lodge house. and i have, by god’s grace, controlled myself quite fairly so as not to initiate anything that might start the spark. this happened for two months. the but for the last two weeks, he became the regular driver of the vehicle that we have used in the field. there was a time when we drank outside with other colleagues. and when i got tipsy already, i felt his toes run through my legs under the table. that was quite awkward because i thought he would never initiate something like that. but he did. and i got drunk, the other boys had to carry me back to my room, and let me sleep.

then he went to a different city, and i stayed in a different place. the night before he picked us up, i bought a red wine and consumed it, at my room, alone. i got tipsy as usual, and felt the need to send him a message and tell him i had a crush on him the first time i saw him. and he responded that he likes me too, but he restrained himself from getting close to me, as much as he wanted to.

and i said to myself, here i go again, with a potential lover waiting for my touch.

the night we were together, we kissed and touched. i went to his room so i can savor his mouth, but fucking is too risky as housemates might have a clue something’s going on between us. we went out instead, checked in at a hotel, then did the lovemaking. he is a very good kisser. i didn’t come though but his touch is enough to send me shivers, just the right amount of touch i needed in the past weeks. he cannot believe someone like me is going to like someone like him. i can sense he’s got low self esteem, and i happy that i have given him care even a little. he doesn’t know how beautiful he is. and i gave him love that he deserves. now, he’s going home to his family. and i hope to see him again soon.

i have tried a spa recently. went there without any expectation, just pure curiosity. i prefer masseurs than masseuses. i decided to get the spa’s signature massage. i called first to check if there are a lot of guests and if i need to wait. the lady on the other line confirmed that a masseur is available right away upon my arrival. when i arrived, i asked for a masseur and told them i want the signature massage. they asked me to take off my shoes and gave me a key for the locker. then the girl led me inside the spa which is a bit dark, and since i have a sensitive sense of smell, i realized this spa is not that clean as i expected. i was ushered to my cubicle, very dark, the massage foam on the floor, which is okay with me, but the sheets are black, so is the small pillow, of which i am not very much impressed.

then a guy outside the cubicle gave me robe, again it is black, or dark green, and told me to use the robe for the body wash. i undressed myself and put on the robe. the guy was polite, cute, not so tall, younger than me. we went to the wash area and he told me to take off the robe so we can begin with the washing part. i took it off, a bit hesitant, and made myself comfortable at the wash table, hehe. he washed my back first, then, my front, while we exchange a few information. he washed me thoroughly, and i liked it generally. he is good.

then he gave me a one hour swedish massage while i lay naked, face down. he is not my best masser so far but he can improve. maybe he is too young and needs more time to learn the skill. but i like that he concentrated on my back and lower back, and butt. 🙂

about the sensual, its nice for a first time. new sensations, new kind of touch. i felt like i am being massaged by a lover. i like the caress, i got wet (to be honest). he held my hands many times. and then he whispered to my ear (which is the best part) “face me”, which for me is so sensual. facing up, he massaged my legs, and my hips, my stomach, my arms, and started kissing me on the neck, on my chest, and on my nipples. this is the most mind-blowing part. not what i expected. and the rest is history. hahaha.

i met this guy in a city far from where i live, i went there because of work. i went to a bar and i met him there. we clicked instantly and he invited me over to his house. he’s half-canadian having his last week of vacation in the city. thank god i met him.

we talked more when we arrived at his beautiful house. he lives there alone for this vacation. he is now in canada, we left the city on the same day. and in a way i am sad for i might not be able to see him again ever. we shared three beautiful, sensual nights. we have talked about a lot of things. he has a girlfriend back in canada. he doesnt look so good, only average. with him, i have to speak english all the way because he doesnt understand the local language very much. but he tried to speak it. and its funny when he do that.

i already miss him. we fucked for like an hour every night. i am a bit tired coz of work but i still want to get fucked, and he sends me shivers every time he fucks me during those three nights. he talks to me when we make love. he wants to know if it feels good. i think he’s the one who made me come inside, or the closest to it. he pumps very fast and continuously, i cant believe how he does it. he carried me and fucked me while he’s standing, without a wall to support us, god he is amazing.

he said he wants me to fall for him. and i told him its unfair, coz we’re both leaving the town the same week. he said im pretty and that he just wants to look at me when i talk. i like his smile, and his playful manners. but i dont want to fall. i really miss him now. he treated me like a real lady at his house. on our last night, we slept together till morning. he said that when he gets back to the country, he wants to see me again, so we could talk and fuck. i miss him, i really do. i cant believe i felt something this good for three nights with him. we connected in a special way. i cant ask him to feel the same. coz he knows how sensual i am. and we didnt have any promises whatsoever. i even wonder if this is really the end of what we have had. but ill be happy to cherish it once in a while. so far, i think, he’s my best fuck. ever.

i want to meet him again. if only the gods will allow. please please let it happen again.